Learning How to Love Marriage - Part 2

Apr 23, 2024

What was the best gift you got for your wedding? I remember getting a toolset, which was great because I didn't own any tools. Micah may disagree, but for me, it was the best gift. We also got China, so we got these place settings, and they're great, but we never use them. We've used them twice in 24 years, and they sit in a cabinet somewhere. But I used that screwdriver yesterday.  

In 1 Corinthians 13, we notice that love is the greatest gift we could ever give someone.

"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends." (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)

1) Love is Enduring 

When he teaches love is enduring it means that love isn't fragile.  

 Love is:

  • patient (longsuffering)
  • bears all things
  • believes all things
  • hopes all things
  • endures all things

We like to think we'd be better off without pain. We like to believe that God wants us always to be happy, and we think marriage is supposed to be easy. But God shows us that in difficulty, love patiently waits for the other person to grow.  That means that "Love bears" with the parts of life that aren't perfect. It believes in the those we love. It hopes for the best in others. It endures through the heartache. It endures through the troubles.  

Parents of young adults and teens...

  • Love patiently waits for your son or daughter to grow.
  • When they are rude, love is patient. 
  • When they are arrogant, love is not irritable, 
  • When they rejoice in wrongdoing, love endures.

Paul's point is that love isn't provoked easily, which means you don't have a short fuse, you don't complain easily, you don't get mad quickly, you don't criticize sharply. You chill out. You show grace, take a deep breath, and realize that people are frustrating; they can be irritating, especially the people we spend the most time with, the people we're supposed to love the most (family, spouse, kids).

In our society, love is seen as a fading emotion that comes and goes with the wind. Or love is viewed as something we "fall into" and can't control. When it hits us, we are done, and when it leaves, it is gone, and we have to go our separate ways. According to God, that is not love. Love endures. It chooses to endure. You choose to love even when things are hard, even when they don't deserve love, even when you don't like them.

Jesus says if you want to follow me, you must deny yourself, you must die to self, and you must die to that sin in your heart that wants to give up, that wants to give in (Luke 9:23).  

Why do we allow this sin to remove love in our hearts for a spouse, son, daughter, or friend? Is it because that person has interrupted what you want? Is it because they have inconvenienced you, created problems, and irritated you? We ask, "Why don't they get it? Don't they realize they exist to please me? They exist to make my life richer and happier; how dare they have the audacity to interrupt my night, my joy? They must feel my wrath!" Of course, you probably didn't say that out loud, but maybe those thoughts are at the core of your frustration with them.

We don't want to deal with their mess; we want to enjoy our life. But Jesus says follow me and I'll show you the most excellent way to live your life (1 Corinthians 12:31). The greatest gift you can give them is called "love." Let your love endure through problems, through mistakes, through weakness. Love those in your life today because it is the "most excellent way" to live. It is the higher way to live. That means it will bring the blessings of God. It will bring more profound joy and life to the fullest.  

Ask Yourself a few questions: 

  1. Who in my life needs "love that endures"?
  2. How can I show them that my love hasn't quit on them?
  3. In what ways have I been selfish toward that person?

Sign up for the TSL 5 Newsletter

Bi-weekly resources delivered to your inbox.